Who to Invite to a Bachelor Party

A traditional bachelor party guest list is typically made up of the men of the wedding party. These days, however, many party planners opt for a more modern celebration that includes the groom’s extended family, female friends, work friends, and other folks. It doesn’t have to be confusing or complicated, but it does need to be fun! Let’s discuss how to craft the ideal guest list and then ensure these honored guests have the time of their lives celebrating the groom. 

Table of Contents:

• Choosing Invitees
  • Priority Guests
  • Secondary Guests
  • Factors to Consider
• Making Thoughtful Decisions
  • Budget Considerations
  • Managing Different Personalities
  • Planning Activities
• Logistics
  • Choosing a Space
  • Managing Multiple Events
• Expanding the Guest List Beyond Bachelors

Choosing Invitees

A bachelor party is a great opportunity for a groom’s inner circle to get to know one another before the big day. So, the bachelor party guest list can stretch beyond a few men closest to the groom. This is a chance for his future in-laws, childhood friends, coworkers, and others to mingle and share in the excitement of one of the most important events of his life.

Priority Guest List

Priority invitees are the core of a traditional bachelor party guest list. Start with the best man and groomsmen. These are often brothers, friends, and family—the men closest to the groom and members of the wedding party. 

Consider extending invites to the groom’s college friends and additional family members like uncles, cousins, and brothers. This is also a wonderful opportunity to reach out to childhood friends he may not speak to regularly, but still considers part of his inner circle. Most importantly, make sure the groom has final say on the guest list.

Secondary Guest List 

If you have a spacious party venue in mind, the guest list can extend beyond priority invitees. The groom may want to include members of his—or his spouse-to-be’s—extended family. This is a great chance for him to spend time with future in-laws, or the partners of friends and family. Close coworkers and former classmates will also appreciate an invitation. 

Factors That Impact Guest List

Here are things to consider when planning your guest list:

• Local vs. destination events: Because destination events can be hard for some to swing, they will likely result in a smaller guest list. Local parties are easier to plan around a large group. 
• Multiple events: If you have an action-packed lineup planned, there’s a chance that some guests won’t be up for every activity. Some may not drink, but love other activities you have planned. Others may only be able to drop by for a few hours. Expand (and contract) the guest list based on the interests and time the groom’s friends and family have to offer.
• Group activities: Some activities offer discounts based on the number of people attending. Others, like guided bar hopping or private dinner experiences, may have set minimums you must meet to book. 
• An intimate wedding party: A common belief is that everybody on the bachelor party guest list should also be invited to the wedding, but that’s not the case. Weddings come in all shapes and sizes, and so can the bachelor party. Just because a couple decides to have an intimate civil ceremony with only close family doesn’t mean the groom can’t have a bachelor party bash with an extensive guest list. The bachelor party is the perfect occasion to celebrate with people who may not be at the wedding. 

Making Thoughtful Guest List Decisions

Building a groom’s bachelor party guest list goes beyond the guests. Budgets, dynamics, and logistics all come into play.  

Balance the Guest List With the Budget

Consider how budget, travel, activities, and social dynamics all influence the guest list.

The impact of your guest list on costs depends on venues, activities, and more. For example, whether you invite four guests or 40 to a casual gathering at a local bar, drink prices likely won’t change. But the cost of a private event or a group trip will likely vary depending on group size. 

Thoughtful bachelor party planning can help bring costs down to satisfy the majority of your guests. Look for group discounts for activities and travel. Destination bachelor parties are often easier to organize with a smaller group, but a larger group may offer more hotel and activity discounts. Locally, there may be cost benefits to hosting a larger group. If a casual gathering at the groom’s favorite bar is in the works, see if they’ll offer drink specials in exchange for a set headcount. Or if activities like paintball or a ropes course are preferred by the groom, see if the venues offer discounts for larger groups.  

Managing Differing Lifestyles and Personalities

Sometimes friend groups include complicated elements that require a light touch. 

Varying Budgets

Different lifestyles and incomes may make it difficult for some friends to swing multiple nights out on the town, let alone out of town. Provide an itinerary in advance so guests can see what’s on tap and can join as they like. And try not to pressure guests that skip an activity; they’re here to celebrate with the groom even if they can’t afford every activity.

Rowdy Guests

Some parties have one guest who needs a bit of “managing” when the drinks start flowing. Or two people in the group who don’t get along. Difficult personalities and conflicts may mean splitting the group ahead of time. Manage tricky dynamics by choosing activities that make splitting guests into different groups less obvious, like bowling where you can book multiple lanes to keep feuding friends separated.  

Deciding on Activities

Even a close group of friends may not agree on every bachelor party activity. If you have a bunch of ideas with little consensus, have guests vote via a tool like Doodle. Democratic choices, which can be made by name or anonymously, are sure to please the most people possible.  

Group Dynamics and Activities

Ideally, the bachelor weekend will include a group with similar temperaments, or friends who know each other so well that there’s less to manage. 

But even with a tight-knit group of friends, there may be differing personality types. Consider everyone’s likes and dislikes when choosing activities. In the end, though, it should all come down to what the groom wants.

For a larger group where some guests won’t know each other, ask the groom for input on how best to manage plans with the variety of personalities. A welcome dinner or pre-party drinks are always a good way to break the ice. 

Keep the Itinerary Open and Flexible 

Some guests will want to party hard each night and sleep until noon the next day. Others may want to go paddleboarding or fly fishing with the groom in the morning. Get feedback from as many people as possible and keep the itinerary open so guests can join as they like, free from stress. 

The larger the group the more the dynamics matter. For example, if the groom’s father or an older mentor joins, consider their activity level when planning. The age gap may make it harder for older guests to keep up if the groom wants a sports-heavy or booze-filled bachelor weekend.

Planning Logistics: From Guest List to Great Night

We’re almost ready to book party venues. Let’s discuss how to build a timeline, manage people between events, and select the right spaces.

Start With a Solid Game Plan

Don’t wait until the last minute to start booking flights, tours, or party venues. You will not only save money by booking further out, you’ll also have better luck finding experiences or spaces with the right capacity for your crew. 

Straight Talk Around Financial Matters

Set deadlines for RSVPs, deposits, and other financial matters. It sets expectations from the onset that will carry over as the group spends weeks making arrangements. 

If you constantly wait until the last minute and don’t give deadlines, some guests may end up paying extra for those who haven’t contributed. This can cause unnecessary resentment that may bubble up during what should be a fun time together.

Choose the Perfect Space for Your Group

Make the night, or nights, more special by renting out a private venue. While mixing with other partygoers is also fun, having a VIP room or private dining room all to yourself for the evening elevates the celebration. If your bachelor crew wants to head out of town, renting a private cabin in the mountains or a house on the beach creates opportunities for guests to spend quality time together before the big day.  

Tips for Space Selection

When choosing party spaces to accommodate your bachelor weekend, consider:

• Ease of travel
• Proximity to any planned activities
• Space for guests
• Affordability 

For example, if you’re visiting New York City look into hotels and rental homes with easy access to mass transportation, or are centrally located to the bars and restaurants you plan to visit. If guests are driving on their own, take logistics into account. Make sure parking is readily available and they can easily get to and from each location.  

Party Amenities

Another element that can make or break a bachelor bash? Amenities. Think through parking for those who are driving, audio/visual hookups for movies and music, a full kitchen if you plan to host a private dinner, and room service, which may come in clutch the morning after a wild night.  

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Pro Tip: If your bachelor party spans multiple days, renting a private home has multiple advantages, beyond potentially being more cost effective than a hotel. Think big screen TVs for the gamers of the group, outdoor space for barbecues and ball games and more space to spread out than a hotel may provide. For local events, private bachelor party venues like banquet halls and event lofts are great options for dinner parties or special booze tastings. 

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The earlier you decide which activities the bachelor and his crew would enjoy, the better your chances are of finding the perfect venue.

Multi-event Guest List Management

If your bachelor party is a multi-day celebration, logistics will play a big part in how smoothly the event(s) go. Things to keep in mind when planning:

• Plan meeting spots: Whether it’s a local or destination event, it’s a good idea to plan for set meetup spots at different times throughout the event. This will allow guests to pop in and out depending on personal schedules, rest breaks or if they choose not to participate in certain activities. Having these built into the party timeline will ensure guests can find their way back to the pack with ease. 
• Secure groom feedback: Chances are there will be guests on the extended guest list who the party planners won’t know well enough to determine activity preferences. Check with the groom to ensure there is something for everyone at the event. 
• Local celebration planning: The importance of meeting spots rises for local celebrations. Not to mention, the need for thoughtful transportation or parking suggestions. If it’s a multi-day local event, some guests may opt to sleep at home each night and then meet back up in the morning. Take this into account when planning out the itinerary.
• Destination celebration planning: You’ll likely all be staying at a hotel, rental home, or other accommodation during a destination bachelor party. While this can make it easier to keep track of everyone, it’s still a good idea to plan for set meetups to make sure nobody gets lost in the shuffle. 

Fresh Takes on Traditional Guest List Rules

Bachelor parties are traditionally for the groom and his closest male peers. That said, these days anything goes when it comes to this once-in-a-lifetime event.

Do Dads Go to Bachelor Parties?

There’s no strict rule against the groom inviting his father or future father-in-law to his bachelor party. This decision, though, should rest solely on the bachelor. If he already has a long-standing relationship with his partner’s father, the gesture will surely be appreciated. And his own father might really enjoy celebrating his son’s last single days alongside his friends. It all comes down to what the groom wants, group dynamics, and the activities planned. 

Can I Invite Women to the Bachelor Party?

If the groom has a long-time female friend he wants to include, then an invitation should be extended. It’s a great way to challenge gender stereotypes, enjoy a non-traditional event, and include a different perspective at the party. Do think about boundaries and comfort levels around the activities planned for each day. But that’s equally true for any men in your party who may not be comfortable with everything planned. 

Alternative Celebration Styles

These days, bachelor parties go beyond drinking games, bar crawls, and strip clubs. Other ideas to consider:

• Take a class: For a low-key crew, look into grilling classes, fly fishing excursions, or whiskey tastings.
• Hire a guide: Fishing trips, guided hikes, and food tours all go more smoothly when you have a guide running the show.
• Go glamping: Skip the tents and make the party a memorable outdoor experience with elevated tents or yurts.

Digital Planning Methods

Bachelor party planners can make things easier by using digital tools throughout the planning process. Check these out: 

• Start a group chat: Whether via text, email or group chat in an app like Whatsapp, keep partygoers apprised of plans as they come together, and as a means of communication during the event. 
• Managing RSVPs: Check out tools like RSVPify for headcount management and effective party planning. Get instant confirmations, and use them to communicate plans. 
• Create a route map: Regardless of whether the bachelor party is local or out of town, guests can benefit from an itinerary, complete with a map of the party route. This way no one gets confused or lost in between venues.

That’s a Wrap

Honoring the groom comes first, but bringing so many people together means thinking about the group at large. Especially if the guest list goes beyond priority invitees. Be thoughtful in planning and don’t lose sight of enjoying the process. When it comes down to it, the perfect venue is what ties it all together. Let us help you find what you’re looking for! Join thousands of other bachelors who found their perfect spot on Peerspace.